Running... Bad for you? SINCE WHEN!

Track started last week, and for a running fanatic like me I was excited. I pushed myself super hard and guess what... It is screwing up my health.
Friday morning I couldn't get out of bed. I collapsed and my sister ended up having to carry me up the stairs. I was more sore then everyone else and it didn't make any sense. My mom took me to the doctors and I was there for three and a half hours. (Let me just say... peeing in a cup when your legs keep collapsing is extremely hard.) They ran a bunch of tests and turns out I have some weird thing going on that I can't even say because the work is spelled extremely weird. Turns out the enzyme waste from my muscles breaking down had entered my blood stream and now it can be potentially damaging to my liver and kidneys. The normal level is 200 and mine was at 718. They gave me two bags of fluids to flush my system and told me that I have to go back the next day to be tested again. If it is high they have to hospitalize me. I was also ordered to not exercise anymore and rest as much as possible.
I went back the next day and it only went down to 688. The doctor said the last case he saw was a girl in Colorado and she died from it. I asked if I could go back to track on Monday and he got really mad. He now has to refer me to a sports specialist and I have my physical taken away. I go back in for another blood test today. Wish me luck.
Who knew running could be bad for you? It's extremely unfair that I strive to be healthy and that is the exact thing that is killing me....

Muffin Tops

I don't even know when my sister and I started joking around about muffin tops, but I always found myself caught up in the moment. She would make a joke and I would laugh and add onto it. Before our conversation was over, we both were on the ground laughing and crying because it was so funny.
I was just on the internet and I came across a blog that was debating in muffin tops were sexy, and a bunch of guys were giving their opinions on whether or not they were. I was reading it when I realized I had no idea what they were talking about! It's crazy that I have joked around about it for so long and never knew what they were.... So, I got on google and googled it... and just so you all know its when a girls fat hangs over her jeans...
I got thinking about and I realized... GIRLS CAN'T WIN! I mean I am considered under weight for my heighth and I run alot, but when I put on jeans that are tight... THAT GUYS LIKE I have a "muffin top"...
So take your pick boys tight jeans or no muffin tops?

More then Sweat

It's not about having the smallest waist and its not about looking better then the girl next to me, although the weight that I lost from it sure is a plus. It's not a chore I do to release stress and develop toned legs, it's so much more then that. It's the thought that I don't have to impress the mirror. It's the relief I get when I know that I don't have to do my hair, coat my face with layers of unnatural make up or even have a matching outfit to do what I love. The road, sidewalk and treadmill isn't going to care what I look like. It's not going to care if I am grumpy and it's not going to care whether or not I shaved my legs. It's always there for me and the road goes on an on. The road isn't going to end. the world is now coated with roads for me to run on, and I plan to do that exactly. I have developed more then just a hobby, I've developed a reliable best friend.

Running was there for me when nobody else was. I look back at the hard times in my life and I see people walking in and out of my life, but running staid with me. I started running soon after my dad died. I wasn't good at it in fact I was horrible, but I kept with it. I was the slowest runner on my cross country team but some how I dragged my butt to practice every day. My team even had to to wait for me to finish my run because I was so slow. Even to this day, I don't know why I kept with it, but I am glad I did.

I didn't have to say anything for the road to get it, it just read my mind. It listened to my head go on an on and it never did judge me, not once. It didn't go on trying to tell me about how horrible it's life was and it didn't remind me of all the things that I have done wrong like my "support system" had done. Instead it just let me take out all my anger, hurt, sadness and even happiness out on it. It absorbed every time my foot hit the ground, it took in every deep breath and it let me waste all the negative energy out on it. It took everything that was bad and in return made me confident.

I found myself wanting to go to practice. I wanted to see my new best friend. I wanted to tell it how my day was just through my fatigue and gross feeling I had in my stomach. I would spend an hour every day and when I was done I felt like a jewel that had just been polished. Sure I was coated with sweat, breathing hard and had numb legs, but I wasn't numb. I wasn't hurting. I was feeling something for once for the first time in a long time. Running never hurt me like the world has. 

Now I am addicted to the adrenaline rush. I want to get to the top of the hill to show myself that I can. I find my sore legs as a reminder that I have a date with my friend that day, and the second I start running the hurt goes away. On the times that I fail to run I get sick. I get tried and I realize it's my body reminding me just how much I need running in my life.

Running has changed my life, and when you run you truly do release more then just sweat.  

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Embarrassing and a Half... :(

I am really embarrassed right now, and pretty upset about it too. I'm just going to start at the beginning of what happened... :( First off... My boyfriends name is Brian and a part of the human body is Brain. Notice that it only takes the "a" and the "i" to change between those two words... :(

When I first started talking to Brian I asked him if he had seen the movie Igor and he told me no. So, I went on explaining how there is a character in the show who is a robot and his name is Brain, and he went to write his name on his brain jar in permanent marker and spelled it wrong and put Brian on there instead. It's stuck on there for everyone to see. Then there is a rabbit in the movie that names fun of him because he spelled it wrong... Now keep this in mind because it relates to my stupidity...

I guess after I told him that it stuck to me. When I was having health issues they scanned my brain (also when we were friends) and I texted him and said, "My brian results came back." He showed it to him friend and they laughed about it. BUT THIS ISN'T MY EMBARRASSING POINT!

Last month was Valentine's Day and Brian was telling me that this year's Valentine's Day would be the first one he was ever excited for, and that got me thinking, "Oh Crap... Now I really can't screw up." I spent weeks thinking about what I was going to get him. I would get anxiety attacks just thinking about what to get him, so I texted my cousins boyfriend (who is kinda friends with him) and asked for advice on what I should get Brian. He told me that Brian was always complaining in history class about how he broke his Thermos.
I got all excited when I got on google because there is a website that allows you to customize your Thermos. So that is what I did for him. I bought him a 32oz Thermos that is stainless steel with a picture of me and in engraved into it. On the top I wrote "I Love You Brian" and at the bottom it had a cute love quote that said something like, "I have a best friend, boyfriend and lover. I'm lucky because they are all the same person... YOU."
Well while I was making that I was also working on a project for school about a disease called Kuru. This disease is caught when you eat other people's Brains. (Cannibalism in New Guinea) I didn't think about my spelling at the time, I was just excited to finally get him something that might actually like...
The package took 17 days to get here, and it just arrived last week. I was worried Brian would hate how I decorated it. I was worried he wouldn't like it. I was already super upset with how late it was, and I was worried about how I spelt his name. I went to print off my project and realized that every time I wrote Brian on my project instead of Brain so I suspected that I spelt it wrong. I checked the mail as often as I could and when it finally came in I was so excited... Too excited... I forgot to check to make sure I spelt his name right. I have it to him and he was so excited about it. It was cute. I felt like I actually did something right.. He was telling me that he couldn't wait to use it at school the next day, and that he wanted to show it off to everyone at school. I was so excited that I FINALLY did something right with this boy... That didn't last long though.
The next day after school I got a picture text from him. I opened it and it was a picture of his Thermos. A close up of his name. It wasn't his name... it said "I love you Brain." ... I spent 40 dollars on that. Waited super late to get it to him, and I just ended up screwing it up. I was so upset. Also, to top it off his friend who I already didn't like pointed it out to him. I called him upset about it and he told me that he liked it anyways that it reminded him of me more. Great now every time he looks at it he is going to think about how much his girlfriend can't spell. That's real cute... :( It sucks I spelt it wrong because now it's not as special. It doesn't say his name on it. It says freaking BRAIN!
I was so upset. I showed my mom and she laughed her head off. That was a mistake because I get to my sisters house and she and her husband started laughing at me for it. Then she posts on facebook about what a dumb ass I am. I get off work and my cousin walks up to me and starts making fun of me for it. I go to the movies and my aunt and other cousin start making fun of me for it. I'm so upset. They keep making fun of me. It bothers the shit out of me already and everyone just keeps rubbing it into my face. I'm not dumb I can spell I just get in a hurry and my hands think they know what they are doing...
They made fun of me at the movies and he was standing right there. He knows how much it bothers me and when they started making fun of me he put his hand on my back and pulled me closer to him and said "I still like it" and smiled at me.
I'm so upset. UGH. It's nice to know I have a sweetheart for a boyfriend though.